Relationship Problems – Self-love

in Principle

Without question, a relationship crisis is an incredibly painful, hurtful and devastating experience that leaves most women feeling victimized. But, you can't increase your self-esteem or learn to embrace self-love if you believe you're a victim. Self-esteem is defined as having high merit for ones self concerning personality, principles and actions. So, what kind of principles do you have? Have you compromised those principles in your relationship? If you don't have a set of principles, what do you really have? The principles you adopt and the belief system you hold not only define your character, but they also form the foundation for self-esteem. Think about it. If you compromise your values or your principles and allow others to mistreat you, how can you retain your self-respect or embrace self-love? To love yourself, you must know what you stand for. The only thing a victim stands for is condemnation to a life of mistreatment, misery and self-pity. And, let me be frank for a moment. That's nothing more than an excuse! That's right, an excuse! You do have a choice! You can choose to remain a wounded soul or you can pick yourself up by the bootstraps, drag yourself out of the mud and become a gentle warrior. So, if you'd like to become a gentle warrior, let's start by defining your principles.


Do you always speak truthfully?

When you see a wrongdoing, do you speak up or turn your head?

Do you always do the right thing - even if it's difficult?

Do you allow others to mistreat you in an effort to gain their love?

Do you always say what you mean and mean what you say?

Do you compromise morality for personal gain?

Do you tolerate inappropriate behavior due to your own fears and insecurities?


Bottom line, you must be true to yourself in order to love yourself! So, don't let what others have done, or what you have failed to do, cause you to live in fear of the future. The past is the past, it is over, and living in it does not serve anyone well. Live in the present moment, be kind to yourself and learn to love yourself. "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today, today is a gift!"  Love is giving, and if you can't give that gift to yourself, how can you give it to someone else?

Good luck and great love,

David Roppo

The Relationship Rehab Coach


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Relationship Problems – Self-love

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This article was published on 2011/04/16
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